Tuesday 3 October 2017

Melisma

I've had a few complaints that there are too many automotive articles in this blog, so I'm going to take an ill-advised swing at politics.

The modern Labour party chose as its leader an unelectable Marxist and then underwent a surge of popularity. I'm furious with these new supporters.

At the last election we were offered more bank holidays, more money, better healthcare and a pony. Nobody asked what the price would be, but that wasn't what annoyed me.

The shadow chancellor now talks openly about overt monetary financing of government spending, of re-nationalising industry and of expropriation of private investments. Nobody has put their hand up and asked "what about hyperinflation, capital flight, the rule of law?" Again I'm happy to let them enjoy their speeches and their conferences even if it looks crazy to me.

What has got my goat is the fucking chanting. Since the summer I have seen news articles mention crowds chanting "Oh Jeremy Corbyn" but nobody bothered to write down what the tune was. This weekend I found out, and to a man these newly politically engaged youngsters has a tin ear. The tune is supposed to be the first two bars of the bass part of The White Stripes "Seven Nation Army". But there's a note missing. The tune has seven notes, the lyric six syllables. It is truly painful to hear. Melisma lets you spread a syllable over multiple notes, but they have to be different tones, otherwise you've just forgotten to sing one of the notes. They have slurred the first two notes (a dotted crotchet and a quaver both on A) over the word "Oh". It's horrible.

I'd like to think that an undercover team of elite Tory musicologists engineered the chant, so that everybody with any sense of rhythm has to sing "Uh-Oh! Jeremy Corbyn" which puts a completely different complexion on it.


Richard "And I-eee-eye will always love you" B

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