Tuesday 16 September 2014


I have just come back from a fantastic holiday in Seattle, and it's the first time that I have seen my old school-friend's new house there. I'm glad it's not my house.

It's too big and it's beautifully carpeted - the hoovering alone would take forever, specially around the spiral staircase. The TV's too big and the picture's too crisp. The cooking arrangements are complicated - I wouldn't know whether to cook in the beautifully appointed kitchen, or on the barbecue outside on the deck. Similarly I wouldn't know whether to eat at the inside or the outside dining table, or which garage to park in.

The view is even worse, the lake and its island completely ruin the view of the golf course. Bald eagles and Canada geese are flapping about endlessly, and the mobile phone mast is added to and befouled by the ospreys who have made their nest there.

The garden is so big that it requires a ride on lawn mower and bird scarers. The garden is on a lake and has its own pontoon but you have to share it with ducks and herons. The tranquility is spoiled further by the frogs in the rushes, the dragonflies, and the endless quiet fishing.

Richard "the sofas are perfect" B

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