Thursday, 18 June 2020

Problem Drinker

I used to go out with a girl who was so unused to drinking that she once woke up (on new year's day) and couldn't identify the mystery illness with which she had been afflicted. It was characterised by headache, nausea, thirst, dizziness and hypersensitivity to noise. It turns out I'm no better. When I visit my mum for lunch she will usually offer me a bottle of exceptionally week Dutch lager (I think it's 2.6%). She will have a small glass of sherry and I'll have the lager as an aperitif. A couple of weeks ago the brand of lager had changed. She didn't mean to do it, but she had tricked me into drinking a bottle of really strong lager (quickly) on an empty stomach. That afternoon I was unusually tired, but in a cheerful and confused way, and my motorbike seemed exceptionally heavy and difficult to operate. I didn't work out why I felt so weird until the next time I was visiting my mum and was offered another bottle of the export strength lager.

Richard "a.b.v." B

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