Monday 28 February 2011


This weekend I watched "Scarface" for the first time. I now see why the phrase "say hello to my little friend" pops up so frequently in popular culture, and have a much better understanding of a very dirty joke that an ex-girlfriend once made with it. My favourite scene was when Al Pacino was arguing with his wife Michelle Pfeiffer, by that point he's a crime lord, a murderer, a cocaine addict, a drunk, and he's been rude to his mother. His wife's main complaints seemed to be what he chose to watch on TV, and that he swore too much. Some arguments are seemingly universal.

Richard "Are Hannah and Tony Montanna brother and sister?" B

Thursday 24 February 2011

Formalities and procedures

I try to keep this lottery syndicate as informal and friendly as I can, however, I need to keep track of who paid what and when, and I need records of a standard that will hold up in court when we're arguing over hundreds of thousands of pounds. Ideally you should pay me in person, at my desk. I will sign your receipt while you watch, that is your legal record. Sometimes I'm not at my desk when you want make a payment, when that happens you can leave a payment with one of my colleagues, preferably Helen, and you must email me to tell me how much you left and when. If the timestamp on your email, and Helen's account match, then I'll happily accept that you made your payment before the draw.

Yes, someone could conceivably notice that their number has come up when they're not paid up, and then persuade Helen to presenting the payment as though it was made before the draw, and convince Rich I to turn back time on the email system while they sent me a notification email, but it's not a risk I'm prepared to guard against.

Richard "dictator" B

Monday 14 February 2011

Can anybody lend me Fleetwood Mac's 'Tusk' on CD?

First they came for Rival Records, but I didn't speak out because they were a bit patronising in there.
Then they came for Our Price, but I didn't speak out because Virgin Megastore had just opened.
Then they came for the music section of WHSmiths, but I didn't speak out because the selection was terrible.
Then they came for the classical and jazz section in Virgin, but I didn't speak out because I didn't listen to either.
Then they came for MVC Music Club, but I didn't speak out because MVC was crap anyway.
Then they came for Purple Haze, but I didn't speak out because there was bound to be a good record shop when they rebuilt Drake Circus.
Then they came for Virgin Megastore, but I didn't speak out because I was still cross with them over that back-order fiasco.
Then they came for Woolworths, but I didn't speak out because Woolies music section was just for children.
Then they came for Zavi, but I didn't speak out because it was only Zavi.
Then they came for HMV on New George Sreet, but I didn't speak out because there was still an HMV in the new Drake Circus.
Then I came to buy a Fleetwood Mac album, and there was nobody left to sell it to me.
Richard "no chocolates, no flowers, no romantic meal" B