Tuesday, 10 October 2017

Humblebrag

I'm almost relieved that my life is back to bewildering social situations and only I have to navigate.

On Saturday night I asked a woman if I could have her phone number and she said yes. The problem is that I had been drinking heavily and I had a bus to catch so I completely neglected to spend any time talking to her.

This is what I know about her for sure:
She has at least one friend,
Her name,
Her mobile telephone number,
That she's single – she actually said "very single" whatever that means,
That we're meeting for a quick drink on Wednesday.
That she finishes work at 1900 on Wednesday.

In her texts she uses the 24 hour clock without punctuation which implies a pleasing precision in her thinking and makes me wonder if she's (ex) military.
One of her texts contained a space before a question mark which either implies either sloppy typing, or that she had carefully reworded the text to tailor the impression it would make.
She's prepared to meet me 90 minutes after she finishes work so she's either: very keen to meet me, very keen to give me the brush off, without a long getting-ready routine, or brutally efficient.

The weirdest thing is that I don't know what she looks like. I don't have a good memory for faces at the best of times. I was on my seventh pint when I talked to her and everything about her has slipped my memory. I know for sure that I found her very attractive. I'm fairly confident of her hair colour. I've got a vague recollection that she's the sort of shape I find most appealing, and that's all I know. I don't know how I'm going to actually meet her.

Richard "wish me luck" B

No comments:

Post a comment