Most unlikely experience from my holiday

I received a glancing blow to the side of the head from a low flying vulture at a falconry display.

I also had to buy public liability insurance to be able to play at a wedding.

Richard "public liability" B

Worst commute this year

As well as getting stuck behind a dithering old person, and a van that would barely fit through the country lanes, a little bit of my dinner escaped in my bag and made its way into one of my shoes (also in my bag).

Richard "Tupperware failure" B

Best Thing I've Read In Ages

Giles Smith in his book "Lost In Music" is talking about Noddy Holder and Marc Bolan:

In those days it was either T. Rex or it was Slade. The whole history of pop seemed to have boiled down to this crucial axis. Actually history seemed to have boiled down to this crucial axis. The industrial unrest of the early 1970's? It was just background hum during the Slade vs. T. Rex chart wars or 1972/73. ..... After the Boy/Girl distinction Slade or T. Rex was the easiest way to divide the people I knew at school. Clearly much was encoded in this choice. Were you a team player, responding to the garrulous network that was Slade, or were you an individualist, smitten by Bolan's singularity? Did you like boys who looked like girls, or boys who looked like Victorian factory owners?

Richard "working musicians are under-paid" B

Joke

What's the temperature in Motown?

3 degrees, maybe 4, tops.

Richard "guiro" B

Too funny a story not to share

I was at a birthday party on Friday night, drinking with several of my friends and some more distant aquaintances. I have always rather liked one of the girls called Booby Redacted (she looks like a little elf with a pair of watermellons up her shirt). I asked her out on a date, she readily accepted and gave me her phone number. About 20 minutes later (during which time we hadn't been talking to one another) she said that she'd changed her mind, and had me delete her phone number.

I also accidentally went out drinking hard while wearing a suit.

Richard 'The new birdman' B

Tunnocks

To celebrate my win on the lottery bonus ball, I have bought in excess of 1/100,000 of the weekly production of Tunnocks caramel wafers. I'm putting them in the kitchen for you to enjoy. Help yourselves.

Richard "saturated fats" B