Coat

The Sebag-Montefiore's are a wealthy and powerful family full of bankers, priests and authors. Although we don't know any of them, my family feels a certain kinship with them for a couple of reasons. Like us they have an unlikely, long and hard-to-spell surname, and my father once accidentally wore a coat home from a party that belonged to Charles Sebag-Montefiore. The coat was apparently almost identical to his own but of higher quality and it had a name tape sewn in it!

I went to a very generous company Christmas party on Friday and accidentally wore someone else's coat home. Sadly the surname associated with it is the much more down-to-earth "Smith". They are both black full length wool overcoats with four buttons. They both have a little chain instead of a hanging loop. I didn't realise my mistake until I was at home and started going through the pockets. The coat's real owner thinks they're so different that he didn't even bother to pick mine up.

Richard "blind or drunk – you decide" B