Video Date

I remember the uncomprehending bewilderment when one of my friends tried to explain to a Spaniard that she was vegetarian. "But you can have some ham. A little bit of sausage is OK? Some chicken?" I got the same sort of disbelieving response from one of my drummer friends when I tried to explain my plans for Saturday night.

There seems to be a degree of sexism inherent in the language because I don't know the word to describe him, but I'd have a choice if he were female (harlot hussy slag slut strumpet tart tramp whore). Anyway I told this gentleman-of-easy-virtue that I couldn't come out drinking because I had a video date.
"Oh very nice," he said "naked skype date on Saturday night!"
"No, we’ll be fully clothed"
"No"
"Yes"
"Oh. Right. But you'll do ...stuff... for each other."
"No, just chatting."
"No. Really? But she will get her tits out won't she?"

Richard "No, fully clothed, like I said." B