Tuesday, 26 February 2013


If you remember The Mary Whitehouse Experience, you might remember the idea that when you see John Major's face, all you can really see is the space where a moustache should go. It's like you've just looked away from a moustache shaped lighbulb.

I was in a conversation last week, and the space where the dirty joke should have gone was more obvious and more awkward than if I had said it out loud. One of my ex-girlfriends was visiting. We're still close friends, but there's a tacit agreement that some topics are ignored in conversation and reminiscence. We were in a posh little café, and my tea came in a china pot with a sparkly knitted cosy. We took the cosy off the pot to examine it, and then I had great difficulty putting it back on. "It's not going to work" said the ex-girlfriend, "you haven't got the spout in the right hole". We left a respectful embarrassed pause and then quickly changed the subject.

Richard "That's not the first time you've said that" B

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