Tuesday 26 February 2013


If you remember The Mary Whitehouse Experience, you might remember the idea that when you see John Major's face, all you can really see is the space where a moustache should go. It's like you've just looked away from a moustache shaped lighbulb.

I was in a conversation last week, and the space where the dirty joke should have gone was more obvious and more awkward than if I had said it out loud. One of my ex-girlfriends was visiting. We're still close friends, but there's a tacit agreement that some topics are ignored in conversation and reminiscence. We were in a posh little café, and my tea came in a china pot with a sparkly knitted cosy. We took the cosy off the pot to examine it, and then I had great difficulty putting it back on. "It's not going to work" said the ex-girlfriend, "you haven't got the spout in the right hole". We left a respectful embarrassed pause and then quickly changed the subject.

Richard "That's not the first time you've said that" B

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